Written/directed by Floria Sigismondi, The Runaways, the true story of rock’s first successful all-girl band (pre-70’s), is a nimble romp through the early days of the genre-busting group. Based in part on the book by former lead singer Cherie Currie, The Runaways is not The Doors with lipstick. Instead it comes off as The Doors as if made by Lifetime. I assumed if there was a movie made about a famous rock band there would be an interesting tale to tell. Rock and roll, right?! Kind of. It all felt very simple to me – like an easy math problem: Desire + Luck = Famous. It isn’t that easy of course or I would be writing for Judd Apatow. My point is the success felt a little too pat for my tastes. But I do remember those days – if vaguely…
I was only 7 or so when heard ‘I Love Rock N Roll’ by Joan Jett and the Blackhearts for the first time. I can remember my older brother making me get up and flip the records back then – his mumbled threats of ‘beating my ass if I didn’t’ so real to me my knuckles would crack I would be flipping so fast. But man she could rock. It was, along with Centerfold by The J Geils band – one of my early favorites. Her videos slammed into my cortex like an 8 ball of grape Pixy Stix (see for yourself). Something about her struck a nerve with me – the dark hair, smoky eyes, fu attitude – it was quite a package. And I was only 7!
Way before girls would become an overwhelming, thought-obliterating tri-breasted (thanks Total Recall) monster in my life – there was Joan Jett (and Wonder Woman. I’ve been told, again, that there isn’t room in my reviews for any of my classic Wonder Woman fan fiction (still waiting for a valid reason why Eddie V) so I will instead make clever use of WordPress and hide a link to my WW erotica somewhere in the review of this watered down, still enjoyable movie). Regrettably, for the next 28 years or so, I would hear ‘Joan Jett’ and only think of I Love Rock N Roll, Crimson and Clover and my brother punching me. Her past rock life was as unknown to me as Divx is to our beloved Apple TVs. But no more – and I am not talking about XMBC.
15 year old (!) Joan Jett (Kristen Stewart) runs into a mental record producer, Kim Fowley (Michael Shannon) and he takes a bit of a shine to her. Flash forward about a second and they are trolling the teen hangouts/bars for other bandmates. Enter Cherie Currie played by Dakota Fanning. Fast forward another few seconds and they are touring Japan as a one of the biggest acts around. Wha-?
The Runaways is over before you know it and not because of losing track of time in the sumptuous story telling. A tidy 85 minutes in and then a rushed and somewhat confusing 5 minute final act swiftly brings this piece of rock candy fluff to an end. Alas, what could have been. 2 ½ stars*.
*I know, I know. ‘Half star? But you promised! And there aren’t any unicorns!’ Calm down. Watch this movie and tell me the performances of Dakota Fanning and Michael Shannon don’t warrant the unusual inclusion of the ½ star.
